Best tips to sleep better

The brain thinks that there is a danger and prepares the body for fight or flight reaction. And all that while your loved one is trying to fall asleep. Thus, the stress hormone called cortisol is being produced.

Your loved one is probably complaining about racing thoughts. Those are the symptoms of hyperarousal. The brain works in high alert mode, and the body is unable to rest due to a constant feeling of being in danger. The first step towards overcoming insomnia is learning that the bedroom is a safe place.

Let us talk about sleep hygiene. Yes, it has nothing to do with keeping yourself clean, despite its name. It is crucial to provide a person with a proper sleeping environment. In order to fall asleep, a body needs to have a low core body temperature. This way, the brain gets the signals to produce melatonin and induce sleep processes. Excessive heat in the room induces the cooling processes in the body.

Light is another influential factor. Blue light coming from phones, tablets, and other devices blocks the natural production of melatonin and interferes with circadian rhythms. Thus, you should persuade your loved one to stop using the gadgets an hour before sleep. I know it might be hard to do so. Even changing the light bulbs to yellow would make a difference.

When the panic attacks start in the middle of a night, you become a hero. Do not tell your loved one that he/she has to fall asleep right away. This creates so-called performance anxiety. It sounds funny, but when a person is trying really hard to fall asleep, he/she becomes even more awake. It is called psychophysiological insomnia.

Thus, try to suggest your loved one the 20-minute rule. If a person was awake for 20 minutes in a row, he/she should leave the bedroom and move to another room. It should be poorly illuminated and the person should read a boring book or listen to relaxing music. Do not allow checking the emails and watching TV programs.

Speaking of diet, caffeine has 5-6 hours half-life period. It means that half of a cup of coffee drunk in the afternoon still stays in the blood system by the evening. In addition to this, alcohol has very negative influence on the sleep architecture. Although it seems that it makes people feel sleepy faster, it fragments sleep. Moreover, it breaks REM sleep cycles, thus a person feels tired even after a long sleep.

Speaking of medications and supplements, it might be helpful in the treatment of insomnia as well. Melatonin pills are usually prescribed to the people suffering from jet lag and working during the night. For chronic insomnia it is not the best choice. High doses of melatonin desensitize the receptors. The key point to increase melatonin is the proper lighting.

In addition to this, magnesium glycinate might be beneficial as well. It helps to relax the nervous system and reduce muscle tension. Although it is considered to be rather safe, it is necessary to consult a person’s primary care physician before taking the supplement.

The most important factor in treating insomnia is consistency. Yes, it is dull advice. But there is no other remedy that is more effective. A person has to wake up at the same time every day, including weekend days. Sleeping extra on the weekends might be fun, but it creates social jet lag on the next day. Consistent waking-up time allows adjusting the circadian rhythms faster.

I understand that it might seem like too much information and too complicated to follow. Your patience is the best tool here. When a person wakes up frustrated, you should listen. You should say “I understand how difficult it is, and we will solve the problem”. Emotional safety lowers the level of stress hormones.

Maybe, we should consider cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia or CBT-I. It is the most effective way to treat this disorder. In addition to this, it is not only talk therapy. It includes sleep restriction and stimulus control. It reprograms a person’s brain teaching it that the bedroom is a place to sleep. It requires efforts, but the results are lasting.

You should become an accountability partner for your person. Help him/her to keep the diary. Diary is helpful in finding out the triggers of sleepless nights. For example, maybe he/she sleeps badly after eating some spicy food, or perhaps Tuesday nights are bad because of work stress. Having the data helps us find the ways to deal with the problems.

Remember, you are not a physician and you do not have to be one. You are a lighthouse. You help a person to sail through the fog. It takes time. Healing process is never linear. It has both good and bad moments.

Do not let your loved one catastrophize the situation in case of sleepless night. Yes, it is annoying, but it does not mean that something terrible happens. Body is resilient enough to compensate such losses. Usually, fear of losing a night of sleep is much stronger than the loss itself. If we are able to remove fear, the sleep will follow it.

Well, take a breath. I am sure that you do your best by just asking me these questions. We will get through this period. It might take a few weeks.